March 19, 2013 by Heather
?I don?t need you.?
Several months ago, Matty and I were chilling on the couch and watching TV. During a commercial break, he thought it would be funny to tickle me. Note: Never tickle me. It is probably one of my least favorite things ever. I get twitchy. Really twitchy. One time, I got so twitchy that I kicked Matty in the head. I warned him not to tickle my feet and he didn?t listen. Yet again, he wasn?t really listening to my forewarning and proceeded to tickle me. Boys.
?Get away from meee!? I playfully screamed. ?No! I need you,? Matty yelled back, in a sarcastic voice. Suddenly, he stopped tickling me and I stopped responding to said tickle. It was as if we both knew an epiphany was coming. I smiled and said, ?I don?t need you.? Matty smirked and let out a faint chuckle.
Then, we both got it. Like, really got it.
Co-dependency is something that many of us struggle with, in large part because it?s something we?re constantly exposed to from the second we enter this world. We might grow up seeing our parents so (generally) happy and in love and, in turn, perceive having a strong relationship with someone as our ultimate source of happiness and ?true love.? Most stories and movies are only complete when two people have reached ?happily ever after.? Or when the big kiss comes as the curtain closes. But ?true love? isn?t something we find in a relationship.??True love is something we find in ourselves. When we love ourselves so deeply, we?unapologetically live in our own truth. We are authentic. We are real. As a result, other people want to be authentic and real around us. It?s contagious. When we love ourselves, we inspire others to love themselves. That is true love.
There?s this idea ?out there? that a relationship is comprised of two incomplete people coming together to find completion in each other. Not the way to go. Matty and I are two complete people coming together to learn from each other and grow along with each other. We love our relationship and find lots of juice and value in it, but we aren?t dependent on it. Matty enhances me but he doesn?t complete me. If we broke up tomorrow, I wouldn?t lose a part of myself. I would feel pain and sadness but I would still be myself. I would be ending one assignment and starting a new assignment in order to grow from the soul.
A Course in Miracles?says that the world?is our classroom and people are our assignments. When we start to look at life this way, we shine the spotlight off using relationships to complete us and shine the spotlight on the Universe, which is always guiding us to exactly what our soul needs. The Universe will always feed your soul in that way.
Listen to the Universe?s signs. If you listen close enough, it will tell you this: you are complete and whole as you are, you do not need another person to make you a complete person, and every person that comes into your life presents an equal opportunity for learning and love.
Stay lovely,
Heather
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Category Love, Self-Love, Spirituality | Tags:
Source: http://fortheloveofkale.com/2013/03/four-words-that-changed-my-life/
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